He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. – Psalm 147:3
I trailed through the hallway in the dark, pushing open the door to the computer room. I could open one eye. The other squinted shut. It had been a long week. And, though the conflict that raged within me was twenty-three years in the past, my heart still ached.
I sat down in my chair and spun around to the window, peering into darkness. Even the sun had the good sense to stay in bed an extra hour. However, God gently shook me and whispered, “It’s time,” Little did I know He had something on His mind.
The Father amazes me – astounds me at how He perfectly plans the details. Looking ahead, He sees what lies on the roadway before us – the things that may trip us. He immediately goes into overdrive to prepare those we need, to see us through. When God finds that little crack in the core that allows Him access to our heart, He wastes no time in making ready the opportunity to move in our lives.
I’ve come to the conclusion, every single one of us have things we’ve hidden deep in our hearts. Things we’ve told ourselves are forgiven and forgotten, but really aren’t. They lie buried just deep enough to be a nuisance – never really rearing their head, but never leaving our hearts either. They’re just there, festering. We tell ourselves, with great pride in our voices, “I’ve overcome that. Moved on.” But, it’s a lie because moving on means, truly moving on. We tend to grasp hold of the smallest detail of the past and cling to it as though it were our lifeline, afraid to loosen the grip and trust that God will catch us should we spiral out of control.
God knows us better than we could ever know ourselves. He understands why we harbor those certain tidbits of the past and He knows why we have difficulty letting go. I find it frustrating that when the Father knows these things, He doesn’t just point His finger and fix them. After all, we’ve made changes in our lives, made successful attempts at getting past the issues. Why doesn’t He just fix the left over?
He leaned over my shoulder and said, “For the same reason you let your children learn. The experience teaches. I never wanted the bad things to happen in fact, I held great hope they wouldn’t. But Satan plays a role in this world as well. I spend a good amount of time cleaning up his messes.”
“Is that so?” I ask the Father. “You’re God, just fix things.”
“I am God and I do fix things. But I cannot work in you until you allow me access. When I see the crack in the foundation, it becomes my desire to pry it open allowing it to bleed. It has to bleed – drain, get all the painful things out.”
“Oh, but what about fixing it?” I asked.
“After the pain drains, I can clean and repair the break. I always heal the brokenhearted when they allow the efforts. They must be willing, prepared, and ready.”
Suddenly, I figured it out. The picture of Christ, torn and bleeding had new meaning. My bleeding was nothing in comparison to His. My wounds were superficial. His were deep. So, again, I am humbled – I am healed.Prayer: I am Yours to heal Father. Take me and shape me. Heal m